Do you know what you want?

From the Dr. of Reality:

In my experiences working with people, I’ve discovered that complaining for the sake of complaining is an easy habit to pick up. Verbalizing what we don’t like about our lives, or listing what we believe to be the roadblocks to our happiness becomes a snowball that grows so big it rolls over everything in its path. Worse yet, the inner dialogues that we often subject ourselves to can beat us down to a pulp, to a shell of the person we once were. There is a way to avoid all this though.

This is sort of a good news bad news scenario. The good news is that you are in complete control and can create the life that you’ve always dreamed of. The bad news is it will require you to change at a fundamental level. Don’t get me wrong this is not bad news as far as we are concerned. We believe that change is great and it should be welcomed. However it is often perceived as bad news by people that have just suffered an emotional trauma such as a breakup. Complaining helps most of us vent and release anger and anguish, but when we get carried away, we lose site of what we want. We want to feel better, but we get caught up in all the complaining. We depress ourselves.

We are what we think.  If we pour all of our energy into what we don’t have, we lose the ability to focus on what we want - hapiness. It is easy to lose site of what makes us happy when we are so focused on what doesn’t.  The fastest way to quiet a chronic complainer is to ask them what makes them happy. Are you one of those people?

If I were to ask you to list the 10 things in your life that make you happy or 10 things that would/could make you happy, what would the list say? I don’t mean things like winning the lottery either, I mean things that are really possible, things that are in your control.  Getting a promotion at work or going to dinner with friends are good examples. Those things typically make us happy. Spend some time thinking about what you want and about what would make you happy. When you place emphasis on happiness, you gain a clear picture of how that happiness will come to fruition.  The odds of happiness becoming a real part of your life are better when you forget about what makes you sad. The bottom line is that we find what we seek, so seek to feel good and make a list of positive things in your life. After that, do me a favor and get rid of the list of things you hate…

“Depression involves sadness, pessimism, a preoccupation with personal problems, and perhaps feeling sorry for one’s self, anguish, crying, and hopelessness. Depressed people often lose interest in many activities and social contacts because of loss of pleasure in and enthusiasm for their usual activities…”

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