Get over yourself

Yes breakups are hard. We get it! Nevertheless, the focus should be on getting over them.  If you know in your heart of hearts that’s is over, why can’t you move on?  Could it be that you are obsessed with yourself.  Yes, it sounds rather harsh, but it does happen.  Depression can be avoided if your mind is in the right place.  It is difficult to “move on” if you are constantly focusing on what you did wrong or why your partner decided to call it quits. 

In most cases the failed relationship never got off the ground.  It could be that both of you were not compatible or that your partner never revealed his or her true self to begin with.  Believe it or not, most breakups that do not involve infidelity are not anyone’s fault.  If you cheated on someone or someone cheated on you, the problem is clear.  A trust was broken, someone was hurt, yet you have to move on.  Can you blame someone.  Sure, why not? Blame human nature for its tendency to look for greener grass. blame your ex-partner for not having the courage to tell you the truth.  You can also blame yourself for not knowing what was going to happen.  Just keep in mind that in the end, it will not help you in any way to cast blame.  Getting over the pain involves work and focus.  Self improvement and reflection are key components of healing after a break up.

On the other hand, if you and your partner parted without a third party involved, then count your blessings and get on with the healing.  If someone broke up with you because they did not see a future for the relationship, then please appreciate how lucky you are.  You get to find someone that loves you for you.  “Moving on” requires learning and courage.  It requires courage to face the future with an open mind. It also requires that you implement what you learned in your previous relationship to succeed in your next. 

Learning cannot come about if you are obsessed with yourself.  You need to look at the situation objectively.  To do this you need perspective. Yes it helps in some cases to look inwardly, but not to the extent that your feelings are all that you see.  Get over yourself and come back better than ever.   In this article you will find out how to be part of the elite crowd Psychology Today calls, “The Thick Skinned”.

“Say someone isn’t paying you enough attention. You brood and brood. “Is she mad at me?” “Did I say something wrong?” Your gloomy thoughts intensify, leaving you emotionally crippled and thinking that you have ruined everything…”

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