Escape – read a book or two…
July 30, 2006
As you may know, it is our theory that escaping is one of the steps in getting over a break up or a broken heart. The reason is simple. When you get away and reflect on what has just happened, you gain perspective on how perfectly natural change is. Change is inevitable, exciting and totally doable. During this time of reflection we often recommend traveling, hobbies, music or books. If you can pull off all of them, good for you.
In case you’re not in the traveling mood or just don’t have the resources at the moment, why not read a book? Why not escape in the comfort of your own home? We just read a great book that helps one cope with emotional events that are not as clear as they could be. Sometimes denial and betrayal go hand in hand. Everything is Illuminated, is a book that gives you perspective on past events that may be contributing to your current state of anguish. The book glides on the edges of what we are all thinking and won’t admit. Joining this journey of discovery and perspectives may help give you insight into what you are really feeling. You may think you know, but it never hurts to find out what’s going on in that protected region of your mind. Yes, we are speaking in riddles. Want to find out what we are talking about? Read this book! A little reading never killed anybody…
“The most tangible hope in the story’s illumination is Sasha’s decision to face the truth of his father’s abuse and break free. Perhaps that is Foer’s point. He–and all of us–must break free of those people and forces that want to keep us in chains and in the dark…”
Breaking up? Make it simple!
July 30, 2006
Ok, ok, we talked about how to heal if someone broke up with you. Now it’s time to talk about breaking up with someone in a compassionate and honest way. It’s not going to be easy, obviously, but it can be quick and straightforward. There is no pain greater than being trapped, especially when freedom looms at close range. To free yourself and your partner it is necessary to break up NOW, so that you can move forward.
Ironically, the person you are breaking up with will also move forward. It may not seem like it at the moment, but any breakup leads to a new beginning for both of you. Think about what they need to hear to feel better about the situation, but for god’s sake be honest. Honesty will set you free in ways you cannot imagine. Think a year from now when you are breaking up. Don’t think about the moment. That is the best advice we can give you. The article below will explain everything. Again, if breaking up is what you will eventually do, then do it now. Don’t give anyone the impression that you will stay when you know you won’t. Many people try to sabotage relationships to avoid confrontation. That is the worst thing you can do. Getting someone to break up with you just cuz you can’t face the inevitable will haunt you for the rest of your days.
One last thing, the article claims you can break up without conflict. Please, that is almost impossible. The odds of their being peace after an honest breakup are the same as winning the lotto – TWICE! Prepare yourself for conflict and hang on for your life. It is worth it in the end. Freedom is important and so is living where you want to live. Be compassionate and think about the future…
“If you’re ready to end a relationship, consider how you can break up without conflict…”
Can your heart really be broken?
July 29, 2006
Geez, there is evidence that a person’s heart can actually be physically broken. Let us know what you think…
“Researchers at Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore have found that emotional trauma can result in the release of hormones that can “stun” the heart, mimicking the symptoms of a heart attack…”
Did Someone Cheat on You?
July 29, 2006
Listen, I’ve been cheated on. Most will say it creates a different kind of broken heart. I like to call it an angry heart. The longer the affair the greater the broken (or angry) heart. There is a lot you can do. My advice is improve yourself. Get in shape, do well at work and prepare yourself for the best revenge of all – success. The more you seek self improvement the better off you are. The pitfall of this plan of course is depression. Depression drains you of all the energy you need to heal. Depression is the only thing that will get in your way. Now you may be asking yourself, “what do I do about that? ” The answer is simple – get mad! Use your anger as the impetus for self improvement. I did this, it works like a charm. Few people realize how powerful and positive anger can be. Society tells us that anger is a bad thing.
I used the following list of tips to heal myself after an ugly break up. The list is great because of its simplicity. Follow the simple tasks that are laid out for you as you pursue success. Remember when we say success, we mean in health. If you are physically healthy, your mind and heart will follow. Focus on work or your craft. You will be surprised at how a broken heart helps with your focus. Your focus will be narrow, so take advantage of that. Feel free to comment on this topic, we will get back to you…
“People may say no one ever died of a broken heart, but when you’re suffering from one, it sure doesn’t feel that way–at least initially. These suggestions may help you navigate the painfully troubled waters of a relationship that has ended…”
Depressed? This guy can help…
July 28, 2006
Laugh and the world laughs with you. It’s true despite its obvious corniness. You just gotta start laughing at how crazy love is. We all take it seriously, I know. Nevertheless, just try to understand that one day, you will look back at your breakup and laugh yourself silly. We all do it, trust me. Listen to Kevin Hughes, he knows a thing or two about relationships…
“Many stand-up comics include observations about sex and the intricacies of male/female relationships in their shows. But few approach those inter-related topics with as much depth and insight as Kevin Hughes…”
Passionate feelings are a good thing! Especially for business…
July 28, 2006
See? We are always touting that strong feelings for someone are worth your time and effort. The more you do it the better you will be at handeling such emotions. Two scholars from Harvard, yes Harvard, agree that strong feelings can actually help in negotiations. Remember, relationships are just on going negotiantions as far as we are concerned. Read on my curious little friends…
” Roger Fisher (left), director of the Harvard Negotiation Project, isn’t afraid to show his feelings, and neither is associate director Daniel Shapiro. The two have recently co-authored ‘Beyond Reason: Using Emotions as You Negotiate.’ (Staff photo Rose Lincoln/Harvard News Office…”
READ MORE…
Love is a chemical reaction, glad that’s settled…
July 28, 2006
Here is another article that supports the fact that love is a chemical reaction. Again, looking at love in this way make take the sting out of your breakup. Remember, breaking up does not have to be a negative thing in your life…
“OVER the course of history it has been artists, poets and playwrights who have made the greatest progress in humanity’s understanding of love. Romance has seemed as inexplicable as the beauty of a rainbow. But these days scientists are challenging that notion, and they have rather a lot to say about how and why people love each other.”
Dump somebody lately? Don’t feel guilty…
July 28, 2006
Look there are always two sides to every break up story. All we know is that you should tell your partner the truth. Especially if that truth involves breaking up. Why prolong it? If you feel guilty, it’s natural. Think of their future and for goodness sakes, read this article…
“Today there are plenty of things that can distract from the relationship with our spouse or the one we love and unfortunately not always are they the same person. Most people enter a relationship with the greatest of intentions and then life comes in and beats the living hell out of both of them. Is that fair?”
Love Is a Science
July 28, 2006
Here is some interesting research being performed on “Love”. Have we actually figured it out? It actually helps to think of love in a scientific way, especially when you are involved in an emotional breakup. Trust us, over analyzing is a great coping mechanism. Read learn and get your mind off all the emotional baggage. In the worste case scenario, you may learn something…
“Emotions like love are, according to clinical neurologist Antonio Damasio, ‘neither intangible nor elusive. Contrary to traditional scientific opinion, feelings are just as cognitive as other percepts. They are the result of a most curious physiological arrangement that has turned the brain into the body’s captive audience …”
Breakups Don’t Have to Be a Bad Thing!
July 27, 2006
It’s like we always say, “Breakups are a window into new opportunities…” Sometimes if you work fast, external relationships (family, friends, pets etc.) can be salvaged. Hey we just report this stuff…
“It would be fair to say that Ezra is one of the great loves of my life. After all, it was through him and our daughter, Elenni, that I learned the lesson of a lifetime–that we each have power to transform fear of the unknown into unconditional love.”
